Honestly, after this last Christmas and the way things are going this year, I am not really loving Christmas time so much.
When I was younger, Christmas was magical. I mean seriously, it was magical. I loved it and I loved everything about it. The traditions my mom did, the smells, the weather...I loved it all. When we were in Utah, I still loved Christmas. We got to do Christmas our own way and I liked it. Sure Christmas is always stressful, there's decorating and shopping and wrapping and EVERYTHING, but I could do it how I wanted and it was still fun.
Now? It just doesn't feel like Christmas! The weather has been awful. Just rain and rain and RAAAAIIIIIINNN and gray and ugly. But not very cold, and not snowy. I miss the snow.
I feel all this pressure from certain family members who put an emphasis on the presents and Santa, and I hate it. Not just because we don't have money to buy a bunch of presents, but because we've never made a big deal about it and our kids have never cared...until now. We've never pushed the Santa thing, I mean, of course they know about Santa and watch the movies and all that, but we don't push a big "Santa's who brings all your presents!! Be good because Santa's watching!!' thing. I don't remember ever learning that Santa wasn't real, I just always knew and I never had a huge disappointing memory of finding out. I would've liked that for my kids, but its not working out. Also, I would REALLY rather focus on the real reason we celebrate Christmas and thats the birth of the Savior. Not Santa Claus.
Enough ranting. The point is, because I feel like the focus is in the wrong place, I get all huffy and sad and upset and bah humbug-y and I can't even feel good anymore. And whiney a little...not that you guys didn't know that about me already. The whiney thing.
I'm trying, I really am. I usually love Christmas music and movies and I haven't even felt like they've made much of a dent. Plus why is time going SO FAST?! Its like December just started yesterday, and now its already the freaking 14th!? I have tons of presents to finish up and things to figure out still. So, how are you doing on Christmas this year?