Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Seriously BIG LONG Post

Okay this post I'm just putting down anything and everything thats on my mind. I have a lot of stuff going on in my head and hopefully this will help get it out and then I can focus on actually doing what I'm supposed to (like cleaning bathrooms and paying bills, you know: crappy stuff).

~First up is the most important thing I need to blog. Got another dream package! YAY! Do you remember how I told you guys how much I hate the Post Office? Well, they either are really mad and trying to get back at me, or I was totally RIGHT--the Post Office really DOES suck! (I like the second option better. Because in that option I'm RIGHT!) Because it took a whole week for the package to get here (ridiculous) and when it got here? It was OPENED! Seriously people, the Post Office delivered a package that had been opened and things were missing! :( Atleast not the most important stuff was gone, but the chocolate was! HELLO?! And there was a card to explain everything and a button, I'm so irritated! Otherwise, THANK YOU THANK YOU Shellie for the awesome gift! The theme this last month was "My Favorite Things", so Shellie sent me some of her favorite things. Like for example, she likes words, so there was a word theme, and the mug is because she loves hot chocolate. My kids will NEVER be allowed to touch that mug, its MINE MINE MINE!! I adore the yellow frame, I know exactly where I'll put it! I love it all and I'm once again in awe of good friends and sweet people, it just doesn't seem to happen enough but I feel like I've been very blessed!




~I'm reading the last of "The Mortal Instruments" series and I wish I could just sit around all the time and read it (I mostly do so don't feel sorry for me) but then I feel so guilty about not getting done the things that actually NEED to be done. I really need the escape sometimes though. Plus I can't focus on anything except the story going on in my head, so I should just sit down and finish it so I can move on...right?

~I'm struggling a little with being a good person right now. I know this is terrible and really wrong, but I absolutely HATE it when people say they miss their husbands because they've been gone on a business trip for a few days. I know its unfair and they SHOULD miss their husband but I just want to scream and gauge their eyes out. I want to compare it to someone with cancer hating someone who has a cold. They can't help getting sick, but it could be so much worse... I really wish I could get over myself sometimes, especially because my own situation could be a whole lot worse too. I just hate it.

~I'm also struggling with being a good mom right now. I hate that I'm the "exasperated mom" right now. Have you ever met a mom like that? Who whenever her kids are around is just exasperated and impatient and wants them to go away? I feel like that ALL THE TIME. And I hate myself for it. Everytime they ask a question, or want me to get them something or breath or whatever, I want to just throw my hands up in the air and tell them to leave me alone! Isn't that awful?! I'm trying really hard not to do that, but boy I'm really tired of being the only parent around. REALLY tired.

~When I was in junior high I had a t-shirt that had a loaf of bread on it and underneath it said "baked". Seriously, my mom bought that shirt for me. (So random, but that is totally stuck in my head. I can't believe my mom didn't get what that meant. And I'm super embarrassed that I actually wore it and people SAW me wearing it. What if I wore it to church one day?! *edit: For those of you who are better than me and don't know what baked means, its another way of saying you're "stoned" or "high", or you've been smoking marijuana. Which was as far from the truth for me as possible.)

~I also was a complete nerd in junior high... And high school.

~I may still be a complete nerd.

~I took pictures of my sweet baby yesterday, and I'm posting some for you to see. If you don't care go ahead and scroll past, this is the last bit of my super long post. Thanks for enduring that! I know it got a little rough somewhere in the middle there.

15 comments:

  1. OH, he is so sweet!

    And I know what you're talking about with the husband thing. Watching what you have to go through makes me grateful my husband is only gone 4-5 days a month.

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  2. 2, 8, 9, 10 and the last picture are my FAVORITES! You need to do one on a canvas...so beautiful Mel!

    The post office SUUUUUCKS! I'm so mad for you...I can't believe they were so retarded! I wish you would have posted the bottom of the box though, I wanted to see how it had been cut open!

    Guess what? You're a good mom, and even good moms feel frazzled. Especailly if they're doing the mom job SOLO! You're tough, you've been so good at juggling everything you've needed to these past LOOOONG months.

    Something I've tried...omitting one negative word or phrase each day that stress me and my kids out. I always say things like "hurry up!" or "I'll be there in a MINUTE..." and my kids feed off the negative energy creaed by those phrases.

    So One day I'll choose "HURRY," or one day I'll choose "IN A MINUTE," and it's amazing that knowing I can't say it makes me get off my duff and be proactively involved with my children.

    ?? I hope you find something that works for you!

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  3. Love the baby pictures!!! So cute!

    I feel kinda stupid saying it, but I don't get what your "Baked" t-shirt means.

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  4. What a little doll! Your photography skills are excellent.

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  5. Ahhhhhhh!
    Adorable BABY!!!!

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  6. What a beautiful baby. And alot of work. And little sleep. Add that all up and it equals a great big huge reason to be tired. be gentle with yourself. It's all going to work out just fine. Smile at yourself in the mirror today and tell yourself, "Self, You Are Awesome!!"

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  7. Oh I love the pictures - Beautiful gorgeous baby!!

    OK here is another perspective with the husband thing. My husband travels for work but I look forward to it. Ha ha I only do because he works at home and has for 10 years. Yes, his office is in the house and as much as I love my husband he is in my space:D We have learned to deal with it over the years but I still have to admit that when he has a business trip and I get the house to myself for a week or two it is kind of fun!

    P.s. I must be a super nerd because I don't get the "Baked" shirt.

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  8. dude...they totally snaked your chocolate??!!!! RUDE!!

    also, I remember the baked shirt...hahahahaha; didn't you wear it with those "shorts" that actually looked like a teeny tiny mini skirt but you convinced mom that because there were shorts underneath it wasn't a skirt? aahhhh, memories:>

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  9. ps - AND they snaked a BUTTON?!! okay that may sound like I'm being sarcastic but I'm totally not...you know I love buttons!!

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  10. OMGOSH--I just want to hug and kiss and squeeze him! As for you, I wish I could give you a big hug and send you out to the movies with $50 for snacks (cause we all know they cost more than the movie) and have your husband waiting there for you. You are dealing with tons and tons and tons and I don't know how you do it. You are not being bad--it makes my heart hurt when you say that. I have been through a lot of tough things but I don't think I could handle what you're doing through right now. Hugs!

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  11. All Post Offices are "Evil Inc." branches. The postmen are itself scary. So, its quite convincing that the office is up to no good.
    The mug looks great. I love the photo frame too.

    Adorable pictures. I was at your other Blog and checked on them there.

    Have a good day...:)

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  12. You crack me up. Seriously Melinda, I love your "true to yourself" spirit. You just tell it like it is and I think alot of people can relate to THAT. I remember how hard it is to be a mom and raising little kids ---and them wanting to breath and all, enough already (tee,hee) You are not giving yourself enough credit for the good job you are doing!!! You are a strong lady or you would have crumpled by now. That little frame of yours packs a whole lotta DON'T MESS WITH ME and I'LL HANDLE IT.
    I loved the photos of the baby , love them love them. I wanna hold him.
    now, go read your book and drink some hot chocolate in that cute mug and think of they saying on it PEACE, even though you seem to be surrounded by more then "your share" right now. Keep PEACE front and center. the kind thats stashed in our souls and hearts

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  13. ooh my package to you looks so pitiful and sad with out the extra stuff that got stolen!

    I seriously have the biggest sad frown on my face!!!!

    I love you!!! and ps did i send that little star pencil sharpner?

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  14. I think I got here thru Cheeseboy, but I can't be certain. All I DO know is that is one cute baby!! Is THAT the baby you are "exasperated" with?? Since I don't really know your story I just thought I'd ask :)
    I think I might follow you.....
    You're blog is kinda catchy :)
    Have a great day!

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  15. I've looked at this post TWICE and I just realized that I never commented! What is wrong with me???

    Mel, I think you are so wonderful. I'm becoming stronger and braver for having known you. Don't get down on yourself for being somewhat burnt out. And don't feel bad about not being all Mary Poppins right now constantly singing and playing games with your kids. Mary Poppins had every other Tuesday off- you don't. AND she didn't have to care for a baby, AND she didn't have four kids to watch over, AND she didn't have to do errands or cook or clean. Now that I think of it, Mary Poppins was kind of a pampered woosy.

    This is something I remind a lot of my friends who are new moms: Your children are not the first in the world to get a new sibling. Moms get tired and distracted and somehow the bigger kids survive just fine. The summer that my 4th was born became one long episode of Sponge Bob for my kids. TV was the babysitter, and I felt guilty ALL the time. But guess what? It lasted a few months, the baby started sleeping more, my hormones balanced out, and I became their mom again and let Spongebob off duty. That moment will come for you too. Until then, read your books, drink from your peace mug, breath deep, and complain to me via blog, FB, email, text or phone calls. :-)

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I'm mysteriously judging whether or not you're going to comment or not...you know you want to.