If you knew me personally, or over the course of quite a few years, you would know that I say these words quite often: 'I think I'm dying.'
I know dying isn't a funny thing to joke about, and really I'm not joking because I AM dying. Or I will at some point.
The thing is, I'm not a sickly person, or a super healthy person. I don't get pneumonia or serious virus's hardly...well, ever (totally jinxing myself yes?). What I do get is horrible allergies, ear infections a couple times a year, and since I was a teenager: weird aches and pains.
Like a tight ache in my shoulder/neck area, near my collar bone. Yeah, its just there. Hurting me. And then it goes away, and then it returns. And I think: 'I'm dying aren't I? I must have cancer or something.' Until it goes away and I don't care anymore.
The latest weird pain? All day today I've had these tingles and itches and numbness running up and down my legs. It started out while I was at work, I was putting some stuff away in a closet and it felt like I'd walked through a spider web, and I jumped and started rubbing my leg. But nothing was there...just itchiness. It's gone on like that all day today. Until now, where my left leg is totally numb and has been that way for the last hour or so.
And here I am again, thinking 'I'm dying aren't I? Or I'm going to lose a leg. Yay.'
Besides the fact that I've changed so many flippin' diapers again today, I wouldn't mind taking a little extended "vacation" in a clinic somewhere to have my "illness" checked out. Be it psychiatric or whatnot.
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