What is it about cliques?
When I was in high school--just like any high school--there were the popular kids, the nerds, the goth, the average kids; you know: CLIQUES.
Did you guys like high school? I don't want to say I didn't. But I didn't. Sure there were lots of things I liked about high school, good experiences, etc. etc. What I didn't appreciate was having to be "cool" for people to be nice to you. I never fit in any sort of group. I had really nerdy friends, I had really popular friends, I knew kids who were jocks, my best friend was absolutely gorgeous; but I was not one of the popular kids.
And I so longed to be one of the popular kids. SOooooo longed for it.
Now that I'm "older" and much more "mature," I realize...WHO THE HECK CARES?! Being "popular" is very much overrated.
One of my Young Women asked me when girls grow up if it changes. I hated that I couldn't 100% positively say OF COURSE IT DOES! Because a lot of women don't change. And the catty, mean, back-biting crap doesn't stop. In fact, sometimes it gets worse. And I have to wonder, why?
This may be SO cliche but, "can't we all just get along?!"
Well, can't we? And now, share your thoughts, please.
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It's a good thing I hate cats...'cuz I'm not catty!!! (sorry) I agree, who cares after high school!!! Unless you are really cute...then you will always be on top. At least that is what the top tells me, I wouldn't know...
ReplyDeleteI did love high school, the boys, not the drama!
I hated high school. I had very few friends and wasn't at all popular. I think that's why I've loved blogging so much is that it's provided the social outlet I always wanted, but never had. I've loved meeting all you great women!
ReplyDeleteIt doesn't end. EVER! I hate it. Its hard because sometimes I feel like if I hang out with a group of friends at church than I'll be considered in a "clique" so then I stop hanging out with them and try to get to know as many people as possible. then I get overwhelmed and not feeling like I have anyone who I can just hang out with because I'm trying so hard not to be snobby. its a fine line to walk!
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't go back fer nuttin'!!!!!! At least when I was younger, some girls were just catty, snotty, and mean with words. From the way I understand it now....they will beat you senseless.
ReplyDeleteIt is still a problem In mty ward the cliques seem to exist in the organizations. The YW leaders have their liitle clique, the primary and so on. And while everyone is nice it's just kind of hard to break through.
ReplyDeleteGood Question... I was more like you. I just hopped around and met as many people as i could.
ReplyDeleteBut...I did have a few good friends that I spent most of my time with.
But it CAN get worse because some women just can't live without gossip and drama...no matter what religion!
High school was fun and weird and a huge trip...all at once. While I enjoyed it plenty, my stomach feels uneasy thinking about it. Let's just say it's not my favorite subject to talk about, but wouldn't be my least favorite, either.
ReplyDeleteAbout chics & getting along...some women are just catty, superficial, bizarre, head-trip types. I have a pretty good radar for chics like that and have learned to avoid them. My own 2 sisters, mom & grandma are plenty enough head-trippy for me. ;)
And it boils down to this: life is too crazy for me to readily invite more crazy chics in. But they're fun to observe from time to time.
I never fit into one specific clique. I was one of the people that had friends everywhere. I think I hung out with the band nerds the most, but I wasn't even in band. How weird is that? But, my high school only had about 500 students total. And everyone knew everyone else. Plus, I only went to high school one year, then I started going to college, 'cause I'm such a smarty pants!
ReplyDeletePS-You're not a jerk. I go on comment strikes every now and then, too! :D We're still friends!
I haven't run into cliques much since I left college. Except...well, I tend to be on the inside. The few times I've been on the outside, I definitely notice them. But I've always been the all-inclusive kind of girl so I try to jump among groups of friends too and keep my experience broad.
ReplyDeleteI was the same way in hs. I had friends from a few different cliques but I never felt like I fit in any category. However that also meant I certainly wasn't in the 'cool' group either.
ReplyDeleteI was just chatting with a friend the other day how it's sad that that sorta thing still exist even though we're so much older now. What is the point? It hurts when I see another woman belittling someone else just to make herself feel better and it hurts to be standing alone when others have a few people to talk to.
Ack late for swim I had more to say, I'll come back and comment later. :)
Let me think...That was a long time ago...Yes, now I remember. I didn't like much of high school. I moved when I was a junior and never really made good friends after that. I think most women grow up and out of that frame of mind, but some don't .. But you learn what a good friend is really about and the popularity thing isn't such a big deal. College was MUCH better! But being a mom is the best.
ReplyDeleteI think there are cliques every where you go. It's natural to be with people that you fit into. As for me with all the moving we have done the past several years, I don't feel like I fit in with any type of group. I'm a fairly youngish mom with a teenager. I don't fit in with the moms with small kids. I don't fit in with the moms with teenagers because they tend to just stick with their crowd. So, I just make friends with whoever is fun that why my group of friends are so diverse.
ReplyDeleteCliques are normal ways to define ourselves, but when they get mean I hate it!
ReplyDeleteI wouldn't go back to high school even if it meant that I got to be skinny again.
ReplyDeleteYou made some really good points.
I love this post. I wish I could tell our young woment that it goes away too. The good thing is that as a grown-up those kind of mean and nasty women don't have to be a part of your life. You can cut them out and not have to see them everyday of your life! In my world periods and cliques won't exist!
ReplyDelete