Friday, February 6, 2009

Red Hot Pokers aren't ALL bad right?

Okay, I hurried and did the last post for Sue's carnival (although once again I buckled under the pressure, and came up with "mildly humorous", if that.). But I did have other things to post about as well, so here goes.

So this week has been a little depressing for me. Not because of anything in my personal life, for the most part, but because I keep watching/reading these really really sad love stories. Really sad.

Like The Notebook. Have you guys seen that movie?! Its incredibly heart-wrenching and just sad! Even my husband cried during it. Well, I read the book this week and although the movie and book are a little different, it still made me bawl my little eyes out!

Then last night we watched Becoming Jane. Also, very, very sad! And it's just made me wonder why the world is so dang rude! You know?!

Why do they come up with these "perfect" men?! Why do they throw it in our faces and act like that's what everyone should expect? I think truly there are a lot of good men out there, but I don't know anyone who can be a Mr. Darcy, an Edward or Noah Calhoun. It just doesn't happen.

Take for instance, my husband. Good man, of course. But he has his flaws. I think this is a much more realistic picture of what men, even good men, are like:

Yesterday, I was super sick. Like really yucky kind of sick. As in, I woke up with horrible pains in my stomach, feeling nauseous and really couldn't quite move off the bathroom floor. I was freaking out just a little because I had to go to work (I called in of course), but I didn't know how I was going to take care of the baby that was clinging to my side screaming while I ralphed in the toilet, and the other two kids that live here and also pick one up from school, when I couldn't even stand up straight. My husband was getting ready for work and just wasn't really helping. He took the approach of 'there's nothing I can do, so I won't'. Which only makes me hate him more. I got "thing's" taken care of after awhile to where I could actually move and function, although the shooting pains in my stomach remained all day. Husband called three times. The first time he was polite enough to ask if I was feeling better. Oh, so sweet isn't he? Whatever. It was completely obligatory. Then after he talked about whatever they'd done at work, he had the nerve to ask me what our plans were for the night. Um, hello?! I'M SICK. And therefore evil. Second phone call comes. "Hey honey, I can't help it, but I have to work tonight about an hour late. Another guy had to go early and since I didn't have anything I said I'd stay." You mean 'anything' like a sick wife at home?! Retard. Third phone call. "Hey, Dufus (name changed to protect the stupid) said if I worked until NINE for him, he would give me Jazz tickets. What do you think?" At this point I may have ripped his head off through the phone. I can't recall the exact phrase but I did tell him if the freakin Jazz game was more important than me than GO FOR IT. The idiot.

Don't get me wrong, I love my husband. But there are days where I seriously wonder how many times he was dropped as a child. The thing is, when he's sick, the whole world ends. What happens when Mom's sick? He wants to go to a Jazz game. How does he not see that this isn't okay? It doesn't take a rocket scientist people.

Really I'm okay now, I understand that men are stupid and selfish, and I'm over it--mostly. Here's the lesson that all men need to learn (I will definitely teach this to my son, he will be perfect.):

Women just want you to THINK about them and then tell them! Simple as that. THINK about us, miss us, wonder how we're doing, CARE.
example: When your wife is sick, dote on her! idiot
example: You work late, call her up and say you miss her--and mean it!
example: LISTEN to what she says, like if she's told you for months what she wants for her birthday, BUY that! And not the freakin day before either.

Whew. I feel so much better. I'm not trying to be bitter or mean. Just realistic. I know all of us have things our husband's do that drive us crazy, and sometimes it just feels so good to get it out. I know I do things that bug him too. Its part of life. And marriage.

Now I'm going to go take those red hot pokers out from under his pillow. See how blogging is good for a marriage? I might have done something I would regret later...
The sooner he realizes the world revolves around ME, the better.


  1. I'm so sorry you were so sick and not taken care of. That stinks. Hope you are better now!

  2. You took the words right out of my mouth! I can't tell you how many times my husband has taken the "I can't really do anything so I won't." approach. I am feeling for you. I'm glad your feeling better. I hate days like that.

  3. Its so true! I was sick yesterday too and my husband went and helped someone else move. nice :)

  4. Oh dear, did you get my sickness by reading my blog when I had the puk-a-rhea monday and tuesday. I am sorry. Husbands....seriously love em....and seriously confussed about them. They aren't programmed properly. Sometimes I will ask my Hunk a Chunk of Burning Love "who are you, Borat?"


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