Wednesday, February 11, 2009

What do Conversation Hearts say to YOU?

For Valentine's Day I bought three bags of conversation hearts and have been plowing through them ever since. I hardly ever stop to see what they say, since they've "modernized" them and now they say stupid things like "e-mail me" and "chill out". So dumb. My favorites are the white ones. Mmmmmm. But if you looked in my candy jar, you'd see mostly yellow all on top, because I HATE the yellow ones and leave them for everyone else. Except no one else likes yellow either. Oh well.

So, the point you say? Well, I was thinking about conversations and thought I'd share with you some conversations I have with myself. In my head. (Don't worry, I don't usually talk out loud to myself, although sometimes I do...)

Convo #1:
While watching Mystery Diagnosis about a woman with liver disease and the signs were sharp pains and bad headaches...

Me: I HAVE LIVER DISEASE!!!
Myself: No you don't.
Me: YES I DO!!! I GET SHARP PAINS AND HEADACHES ALL THE TIME!!!
Myself: No, you're fine, its probably just gas. And too much Mountain Dew.
Me: Okay, you're probably right.
Myself: Sheesh, way to over-react.
Me: I still think there's something wrong with me...
Myself: You are a tard.

Some other time:
While talking to my sister...

Me: Why isn't the phone on the charger?
Myself: Hmmmm, thats weird, where'd I put the phone?!
(walking around the house looking for the phone)
Me: OH! I'm ON the phone, I'm holding the phone in my own dang hand!
Myself: You are a tard.


Another thought:
While talking to someone at church, or work, or just anywhere really...

Me: Stop staring at their nose.
Myself: Look away!
Me: I can't do it! There's a booger in there!
Myself: They're gonna know you're looking at them, don't touch your nose!
Me: I can't help it! I just wiped my nose, and looked at their nose, do you think they know?!
Myself: You are a tard.
(Strange replays of "Better Off Dead" going on in my head now.)

Last one I promise:

Me: I'm so funny! hehehehe
Myself: You are a tard.

So, what kind of conversations do you have with YOUR self?

9 comments:

  1. Thats because your inner self would call you a tard. You're obviously a faster learner than I am! hehe

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  2. I think they need to make a conversation heart that says You Are A Tard. But seriously, go to this post here http://howellherald.blogspot.com/2009/02/womens-conference.html
    because if you keep calling yourself a tard, you're going to end up on serious depression meds (I know of which I speak--my husband and daughter are very hard on themselves .. .)

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  3. Oh my gosh, those were great. I love you---I feel so much bett now knowing OTHERS have such meaningful conversations with "self". who better to talk to then "self" who understands us better then "self" I love self. (or you are just a tard) BUT A FUN ONE... NOTHING WRONG WITH BEING A TARD.

    p.s thanks for your thoughts about"comments" on my Blog. Nice to know how others feel about that topic. Maybe I'll just send myself comments from SELF cause I TOO am a tard.

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  4. You actually eat the conversation hearts? Anyway. . . I usually don't have conversations with myself, I have conversations with other people in my head. Kind of a lot actually. It's a bad habit. And when I do have conversations with myself they tend to be out loud. I should really work on that.

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  5. i love conversations <3's

    mine usually go like this.

    me: you don't need to eat that
    myself: yes you do
    I: DON'T Listen to myself
    myself: Shut it I you don't know nuthin
    me: what about me
    myself and I: Shut it me this is between myself and I
    me:fine while you guys are arguing I'm just going to eat this chocolate cake. the entire thing.

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  6. I pretty much only eat the white hearts, too! I always feel like I am talking to myself. But that may be because I'm nearly always home alone with a baby who can't talk and never listens! But, I've been known to converse with myself in other ways, as well. Seriously, all the cool people are doing it!

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  7. Heidi, I really am not that hard on myself--honestly though, I used to be, but I've learned to let things go and just have a good time. To love myself instead of caring SO much what other people think, but sometimes it's hard. Thanks for that link, great points!
    Wendy, you know, I'm slightly in love with you. You're so awesome!
    Rachel, oh yes I eat conversation hearts! Is there sugar in them?!?! :D
    Shellie, I love you!! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!! (sung from Elf) Yes, I've had that exact conversation too!! But thats not surprising is it?! haha
    Mallory, oh yeeah the white ones are the best! You're probably right, they say women have twice as many words they need to speak in a day, so I guess we just start talking to ourselves since the men aren't around? :)

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  8. Oh my goodness, I just "found" your blog and I must say I LOVE the yellow convo hearts! Can you do a giveaway with your yellow leftovers, lol. I bought a couple (or few) bags of the large ones (which are the best cuz they're so soft and only .49 cents now!) I'm totally at my desk, bag emptied and picking out all the yellow ones....I never touch the rest! Awesome blog, btw.

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