Thursday, April 2, 2009

Wrong On So Many Levels

This is really hard to talk about guys. Not because its emotional, or a tough subject, just because it's REALLY EMBARRASSING. I keep debating on if I should tell you or not, but hey, why the heck not?! When I meet Heidi this month, she won't be able to look me in the eye, but who the heck cares?! Kristina will never let me near her Snuggie, but I think I can live with that! Shellie will claim we were never twins and she has no idea who I am, but I'm pretty stubborn, I'll make her get over it!
Besides, I can't be the ONLY person that this has ever happened to...right?!

Oh...
So...
Hard...
To...
Admit...

Okay already, to preface this, my family has been very sick this last week. Husband came home from work Monday night feeling really crappy (heh, heh.) and I mean CRAPPY--literally. He had the runs the whole night. The Boy had a fever this week and has been sleeping a ton, and Middle Child is now starting to feel a little warm and saying her tummy hurts. So, it shouldn't surprise me that eventually something is going to effect ME right? Well, last night right before LOST started (I so am not liking Jack right now, by the way...) I started feeling bad. But just like a sore throat/cold sort of bad. Not like the hershey squirts bad, which is GOOD. I took some medicine and I'm dealing. Thats not where this story ends, not even close. And now today, even with my kids not feeling so hot, I had to go to the store. We needed diapers and wipes and I had put it off as long as possible.

There you go, I've set it up for you. I've gone to Costco, paid for my groceries, had a slice of pizza with the kids, and I'm leaving the store. I don't know your stand on farting but every once in awhile even out in public I have to just eek one out. I'm not disgusting about it, just if I'm all alone and it has to go, I can be quiet about it and let it go. Am I the only one? Am I the only one willing to talk about it? I know, I really have a problem.

So there I was, walking out of Costco, pushing the cart, and I felt the grumble, and I did it. I farted.
Now if that wasn't embarrassing enough to do and also admit, this story goes one up from that.

I shat myself. *waaaaaaahhhhhh*

PLEASE please pLeAsE tell me I'm not that only one that this has ever happened to!! Or am I the only bloggist actually dumb enough to admit to it? I'm sure we can all agree on the latter...

10 comments:

  1. Oh yeah, every good story has to do with poop! LOL!!! You are so brave to blog about this! I actually have a fart story that I am going to be blogging about tomorrow, but after reading this, it isn't very good! Actually, it's quite tame, and boring. :D

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  2. OMG!!!! BWAHAHAHHAHAH!!!!!! Sorry. I think that a lot of people have done this, but VERY few admit it. I am not even gonna confirm nor deny it!!

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  3. You are indeed one brave woman. Really. I'm debating whether or not to admit anything at this point. . .

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  4. My Snuggie lives with my husband. I'm sure it's nto fart free. And if you're going to meet Heidi, you will probably meet me!

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  5. HUH? and HOW? and HUH?

    That's is the WORST...now I can never admit to doing that in public...but it has happened from time to time when I have been at home and innocently thought it was a fart...but it wasn't! :)

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  6. See Shelle! I KNEW someone else had this happen, you're the only one brave enough to admit it! I applaude you. ;) Yes, its happened to me at home as well, thats a whole other embarrassing story in itself actually. Wow, my life is full of poo stories. :(

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  7. Sister oh sister...If people don't admit it they're either perfect or lying....do you think I'm perfect? hmmmm?

    Set aside April 11, dearie

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  8. That's why I love reading your blog -- i love honesty. I am NOT beyond a fart---ahhhh, feels good. (giggle) and what happened to you in Costco, we call that "launching a live one"
    It's ok, really.

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  9. I used have a very unique gift in that I can tell when my farts will be loud or silent. Yet, somehow that "gift" has been failing me, since I too have let out a very public fart that should have been silent!

    Love your blog! (found it in mormon mommy blog)

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  10. Hi, I just stumbled onto your blog, I hope you don't mind if I make a comment.
    YOU ARE ONE BRAVE LADY TO SHARE YOUR STORY. My husband is sleeping so I have been suppressing my laughing (as tears roll down my face) as I read your post about this event we call "sharting"
    I do have one question though, Everyone farts so why do we all act like we don't?

    Anyhoo, I love your blog and will probably visit often.

    Hugs,
    Connie

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I'm mysteriously judging whether or not you're going to comment or not...you know you want to.