Okay I might really be screwing myself over here but I just can't stop myself. Something has been on my mind lately (and by "on my mind" I mean, REALLY BOTHERING ME). I'm going to try really hard to not be offensive, so will you please also try really hard not to be offended?
Yes?!
Really, you will try? Good. I feel so much better!
What I want to talk about is Stay At Home Moms. Touchy, I know. I really do know because for five years I was a stay at home mom. Up until last year I was at home with my kids, and so no one can tell me I don't know what its like to be at home raising my kids. Even now, I don't think my job makes things much different, I work part time teaching preschool at a daycare. I'm home by noon most days, my kids are at the daycare with me so if there's any sort of problems I can take care of it myself--no one else.
But last year before my son was born, I worked full time at the daycare for quite a few months and honestly it was really hard work! So you can see, I've been on both sides of my topic. I've been a working mom and a stay at home mom, so obviously my opinion is logical and informed and I know everything. Na Na nana NA!
When I've observed ladies talking and attitudes exhibited on this subject (of being a SAHM or a WM--that's working mom, yo.) I've noticed a little trend. There is a small group of moms who sort of make me a wee bit upset. These certain kind of SAHM's think that they are better than the WM's. They frown upon the woman who has to go out of her home to work. I ran across a blog awhile back that said she was crafting and her working friend called and asked her what she was doing, she was so put off by it and said something to the effect that her friend would NOT be able to understand because she works. WHAT?! So because I work, I don't remember how to craft anymore?! I'm shocked, I wish someone had let me know that before I started working! NOOOOoooooooooo!!
In my experience, when I was a SAHM I was seriously lazy--if I'm really being honest with myself. It was like the day was always there, I had any time of day to do what I needed to do, so I was disorganized and well, like I said, lazy. Maybe not everyone is like me, and really, good for you. But when I went back to work, all of a sudden I didn't have my whole day before me. A lot of my time was spent gone at my job. So then I came home and still had to get done all the things I did before, and still raise my kids and anything else I wanted to do. When I went back to work, I became MORE organized, I did MORE crafting, I got MORE done than before. I appreciated my time MORE.
What this post is really about though? We are ALL moms. We truly need each other's support. Instead of tearing one another down, we should be unified and help each other up. I hate the segregation of SAHM and WM, we should become SAHOWMA (that's Stay At Home OR Working Mom's Anonymous, fo shizzle)! A place where we can come together and work past the stereotypes! A place where we can share mom stories, and not care whether you work or not! A place where there is no one mom that's better than another! Doesn't that just sound so ideal? Or AWESOME?!
Well, it does to me.
And I'm the best mom ever, so you should listen to me.
(Oh, if you want to know the blog I was talking about, just ask, I'd be happy to throw her under the bus--Oooooh she burns me up! Just kidding guys, kidding!)
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
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I completely agree with you! It's unfortunate, but I do see a lot of judging in the LDS church of working moms.
ReplyDeleteAnd I can't say for sure how I will be when I have children, but I suspect that when they get a bit older, I will probably want to work at least part time, so I don't get completely lost and drained.
AMEN SISTA!! You hit that right on the nose!
ReplyDeleteI've been the SAHM, PTWM, WM and the down right lay on my behind eating bon bons (well dry fruit loops) kind of mom.
I say UNITE or we are all gonna throw boogers on ya!
I think you are totally right. I'm a full time SAHM and I get it in the other direction. Basically, I'm not doing my duty to society by staying home. According to my naysayers, I need to get out there and share my time. OR I will lose myself. I think I'm doing pretty good, to tell you the truth. I wish people thought more before they spoke.
ReplyDeleteAnd I wish we could all just accept that everyone is not the same: they don't have the same needs, the same wants, the same opportunities, the same talents. So what if we are all different? It's a it should be!
I am a lazy SAHM. It's sad.
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